For Shirley

My friend lost her grandson.  He was still young, early 30s, and her heart is broken.  When he was a baby, she cared for him, took him to church, and poured so much love into him.  His name was Kelly and as I agonized last night over this situation, wondering what words I could use to comfort her when his final breath was taken, I realized I had none.  

Sigh.

I tried to think up ways to say "I know how you feel" but I don't.  I haven't lost one of my grandchildren.  I thought maybe I could say something to the effect of "The lessons you taught him as a child will not return void."  But, I didn't know him so how can I vouch for this Biblical truth when I wasn't a part of the village that raised him?  

I thought I could just go to her and hold her and let her lead into the next part.  Maybe she'd cry.  Maybe she'd share some more stories with me.  Just the other day she showed me his high school picture and I must say, he sure was a looker!  Maybe she'd have more photos and tales to go with them that would help to heal her heart as it aches for the little boy that she used to hold in her arms.

Lastly, I thought to myself what would I want at a time like this?  What could my new friends offer who really don't know my past, my family, and what made us function and dysfunction?  What would I want from folks who are trying to help when I could barely stand, much less carry on a conversation, trying to introduce them to my beloved when my soul felt like it was being ripped apart?  Certainly not platitudes and Bible verses taken out of context.  I would not want my grief to be contained because of fear that they would think I really have lost it.  I would not want sympathetic smiles when they could not possibly know the extent of the anguish I was feeling.

So, for now, I will do nothing.  For this day, I will pray for my friend's heartache and I will plan something for another day when she has had time to process this loss.  And then, one day soon, I'll give her that hug.  Hopefully I will get to listen to those stories of Kelly and see more images of this young man who is no longer with us.  I will learn from this experienced woman more about grief than I have been exposed to and how she loved through it all.  For you see, love is the greatest and Shirley has that so deeply engrained in her that I just know that she will stand tall along this pathway that she never wanted to walk down.  Though I cannot go the whole way with her, I will meet her on down the road to let her know she's not on this journey alone.  And until then I shall leave her in our Father's care and comfort.  After all, He does know what it's like to lose a child.  Who better to commiserate with and to cry with than God Himself?  May He bring peace through the turmoil is my earnest prayer, asked in the name of Jesus Christ.  Amen.

That's Me Jesus Is Praying For!

In John 17, Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane, doing something that--if you will allow yourself to be transported back in time--just may have you thinking differently the next time the tempter comes along and tries to tell you that you are worthless, useless, and not really a child of God. For in this prayer, in this last conversation with His Father before going to Calvary, Jesus had you on His heart. He did!

"But Stef: I wasn't even alive then. How can this be?"

Oh, my precious friend, I assure you that it was! For you see, long before the world came to know you, long before the garden, and long before the world even existed, you were on His mind. He knew all about you--from the size of your shoe to the tint of your hair. He knew you'd need extra support in certain areas of your life while in other parts your independence would shine forth. He knew the road you would travel and even though it may have been different than His original plan, He allowed you to traverse it so that you could decide for yourself what truth is.

For the next few minutes, I want you to pause your life and go back. Go back to the garden with me, with Christ. Hear Him earnestly crying out to our Father on your behalf. Feel His love as He tells God how much He loves you and how He longs for you to complete the circle in heaven with Him and God. And get this: He doesn't just want you there as a bystander. Un unh! He wants you to have the same portion as He has! Unfathomable? I agree!

So, are you ready? Ready to remember your heritage and stop the lies that no one cares about you? I assure you: Someone does. And even as you read these words right now, He's still praying for you, interceding on your behalf for that silly thing you just did that the devil is beating you up over. Jesus knows the world is not your friend because it wasn't His friend either. However--or perhaps in spite of this--Christ knew the battles you would face, the power you would need, and the encouragement to keep striving until the day He comes back for you. Read this chapter and replace my name with yours. Revel in it. Read it again. And again. And again until it finally sinks in: Jesus loves you. You! Let Him fill you with joy today as these words permeate and penetrate into your soul. You are worth it. How do I know? Hmn hmn hmn. Oh yeah: the Bible tells me so! But don't just take my word for it, Precious. Read for yourself and see!

When Jesus had spoken these words, He lifted up His eyes to heaven, and said, “Father, the hour has come; glorify Your Son that the Son may glorify You, since You have given Him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom You have given Him.  And this is eternal life, that Stefanie knows You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.  I glorified You on earth, having accomplished the work that You gave Me to do.  And now, Father, glorify Me in Your own presence with the glory that I had with You before the world existed.

“I have manifested Your name to the people whom You gave Me out of the world. Yours Stefanie was, and You gave her to Me, and Stefanie has kept Your Word. Now Stefanie knows that everything that You have given Me is from You.  For I have given her the Words that You gave Me, and Stefanie has received them and has come to know in truth that I came from You; and Stefanie has believed that You sent Me.  I am praying for Stefanie. I am not praying for the world but for those whom You have given Me, for Stefanie is Yours. All Mine are Yours, and Yours are Mine, and I am glorified in them.  And I am no longer in the world, but she is in the world, and I am coming to You. Holy Father, keep Stefanie in Your name, which You have given Me, that Stefanie may be one, even as We are one. While I was with them, I kept them in Your name, which You have given me. I have guarded them, and not one of them has been lost except the son of destruction, that the Scripture might be fulfilled. But now I am coming to You, and these things I speak in the world, that Stefanie may have My joy fulfilled in herself. I have given her Your Word, and the world has hated her because Stefanie is not of the world, just as I am not of the world.  I do not ask that You take her out of the world, but that You keep her from the evil one.  Stefanie is not of the world, just as I am not of the world.  Sanctify her in the truth; Your Word is truth. As You sent Me into the world, so I have sent her into the world. And for her sake I consecrate Myself, that Stefanie also may be sanctified in truth.

“I do not ask for Stefanie only, but also for those who will believe in Me through her word, that Stefanie may be one, just as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You, that Stefanie also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You have sent Me. The glory that You have given Me I have given to her, that Stefanie may be one even as We are one, I in her and You in Me, that Stefanie may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that You sent Me and loved her even as You loved Me.  Father, I desire that Stefanie also, whom You have given Me, may be with Me where I am, to see My glory that You have given Me because You loved Me before the foundation of the world.  

"O righteous Father, even though the world does not know You, I know You, and Stefanie knows that You have sent Me.  I made known to her Your name, and I will continue to make it known, that the love with which You have loved Me may be in her, and I in her.”

Now, don't you feel better? I know I do.  See you next time!

Whole Lot of Shaking Goin' On? I wish!

According to my Google feed and Facebook reminders, today is International Day of Peace.  According to ibtimes.com:  “The UN inducted the peaceful holiday back in 1981, devoting the day to 'commemorating and strengthening the ideals of peace both within and among all nations and peoples.'”  

As I ponder the events of the last few days, peace would not be a word used to describe the atmosphere around them.  No, don’t stop reading because you think I am going to get all political and discuss racism and the Black Lives Matter Movement or defend the police departments or any other such arena.  Bear with me for just a couple of minutes, will you, please? I’ll try to not keep you too long.

What strikes me the most here lately--if I was using a word to define it--is that there is an air of non-concern, of aloofness.  Not that folks aren’t participating in debates, riots, and so on.  But rather, that there just does not seem to be any accountability for actions that we all choose to partake of.  We profess to being a Christian nation and yet our actions are showing that this quality just isn’t measuring up.  Our peoples, our friends, our families, neighbors, churches, and places of employment are divided.  Few agree on who is right, who’s wrong, and who needs to change.  Finger-pointing has reached an all-time high as--again--we profess to being Christians but...our fruit baskets are empty.

We can’t just say the words that are politically correct, friends.  We can’t in public declare one thing while behind closed doors we’re plotting on one another.  Instead, we should be praying for one another, for healing, for peace, and for unity.  We can’t just say we are “Christians” and then perform acts that must make our Lord bow His precious head in shame.

Are you familiar with this verse, the one pictured?  I’ve heard it for most of my life and must admit to feeling fearful each time.  It’s from James 2:19 and reads as follows:

Thou believest that there is one God; thou doest well: the devils also believe, and tremble.

Why aren’t we trembling, brothers and sisters?  Why aren’t we shaking in our boots at what is going on in our nation, in our schools, communities, and yes, in our homes?  Why aren’t we at the bare minimum giving God due diligence and standing with Him as we strive to figure this vapor of life out and how to live peaceably with one another?  For when all is said and done, that’s all that will be left:  a faint disturbance of air where we once were.  Dissolving into the wind, and leaving behind a trace of...of what?  A sweet-smelling savor?  Oh, God!  How I hope to!  Rather than the stench of an unpleasant odor, may my life be one where someone remarks to another, “Did you smell that?  Its fragrance reminds me of...of...of flowers.  Sunshine.  Love.  Happiness.”

And may the one spoken to reply “Oh yes!  I know what you mean!  It’s been too long since that scent has been around.  Reminds me of better times when all was right with the world--or at least my world--because Stefanie was in it.”

Okay, okay.  Stop queuing up “You’re So Vain.”  I’m really not.  I’m just on a mission to matter, to make a difference, to motivate others to good works, as I’ve been instructed to do.  Lesson’s over for today, class.  For your homework, I want you to consider the heart of the matter, today on International Day of Peace.  Love one another.  Love your neighbor as yourself.  Do unto others as you’d have done unto you.  Yep:  you have to make the first move.  If peace is to have a chance, it’s got to begin with you.  Stop following the crowd and lead by example.  Who knows?  You might just one day have a movement named after you!

Let’s pray!

Oh Father, what a jumbled mess this blog is today.  Too many thoughts are running through my mind, jockeying for position as I endeavor to share the key point of why we Americans aren’t trembling, why we aren’t afraid of the consequences of our actions, of knowing You are watching our every move, reading our every thought, and waiting to see if our salvation is true or if self-reliance is going to rule our lives.  We say we’re Yours, Father, but we act like...dare I say it? Bastards.  We act like we’ve never heard the truth taught to us for so long.  We damage and destroy lives and property, fighting for “our rights” as humans--regardless of our skin color, social status, or citizenship.  

Have we forgotten this world is not our home, that we are all pilgrims, aliens?  Have we learned so little, Lord, that we think we are entitled to what belongs to another?  

Oh Lord!  

I cry out to You for mercy on my nation, on my neighbours, but mostly on me.  May I tremble with reverent fear as I await Your deliverance, Lord.  May I love better than ever before.  You are God.  Alone.  You are in control even when the world’s events seem to be so off-kilter.  You’ve got us, Lord, the ones Who you called.  How I hope our election may somehow find favor in Your eyes as we all purpose to do better, to love You above all others, and then?  And then to love our neighbor as ourselves.

In the name of Jesus Christ I pray these things, Lord God.  Amen.

Broken and Beautiful

I have truly enjoyed my sunflowers this summer.  They have added light and beauty to my home and seeing them standing proudly, bowed slightly towards the sun, has added new dimensions to my appreciation for our Lord.

Last night when Steve and I got home, there was a full moon, shining down the road to the end of my ‘hood.  Wanting to capture its beauty and light, I quickly got my camera phone out and unsuccessfully tried to photograph it.  The light from it was just too intense for my feeble camera’s ability to truly show what wonder it was creating.  Knowing that the heat from the past few weeks has taken its toll on our vegetation, I meandered around to the side of the house to peek at what was left of my sunflowers.  You may think I am weird (and you wouldn’t be the first to do so) but the verse that popped into my head when I saw them was “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.  Ecclesiastes 3:11).

Yes, these former standing-tall flowers were now nearly spent.  Their seeds have long been used to feed the birds and other critters that may have gotten to eat a scrap morsel or two that those hungry feathered friends of ours left behind.  Ooh, that reminds me of when the Canaanite lady was sitting at Jesus’ feet, waiting for a crumb from the Master’s table from Matthew 15.  She had asked Him for help and he replied that He was sent to the lost sheep of Israel.  Her response to this caused a great reaction in Jesus and in those around Him:

The woman came and knelt before him. "Lord, help me!" she said.

“He replied, "It is not right to take the children's bread and toss it to the dogs."  

"Yes it is, Lord," she said. "Even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their master's table."

Then Jesus said to her, "Woman, you have great faith! Your

request is granted." And her daughter was healed at that

moment.”  

Faith. What a tremendous word.  

Take one last look at my sunflowers.  They will soon be pruned down and perhaps they will take root over the winter months as they slumber and when spring comes?  Oh, how tremendous it would be to see them shoot up and grow strong and tall once again!

Notice in particular the sunflower on the far right.  Do you see it?  Stooped over.  Broken, yet still bowing down to its creator.  Its work not done completely yet, it takes a final opportunity to pay homage to the Lord, to the Son, to remind me again that I am to do the same.  As my bones age and bend, may my soul maintain the beauty once given to it.  May my seed continue producing long after my eternal body is gone.  May my faded beauty still shine as brightly as possible for my Maker.

You Can't Lose Me

As I was reading through the Book of Romans today, I came across this portion from Chapter 11:29:  for the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.  Now, for those of you who know me best, you know there is usually always a song either going through my head or that pops into it to suit the occasion at hand.  Today was no different.

Way back in 1995 (yikes:  that’s over 20 years ago!!), Faith Hill sang a song called “You Can’t Lose Me.”  That was what popped immediately into my head while reading this verse.  Mmn hmn:  you know it too, don’t you?  As the chorus echoes in your mind, think of this as Jesus singing it instead of Faith.  

You can't lose Me
Bet your life
I am here and I will always be
Just a wish away
Wherever you go
No matter how far
My love is where you are
You won't be lost if you believe
You can't lose Me

Sadly, there are some religions that teach one can lose salvation but let me assure you--according to the Holy Word of God--you cannot!  Ever.  Never.  Never ever ever!  Irrevocable is defined as “not able to be changed, reversed, or recovered; final.”  The calling of God is irrevocable, friends. It cannot be taken away, lost, not changed. Glory! God's not going to change His mind about His decision of calling you to be His child. Happy sigh.

So, once more, sing the chorus to “You Can’t Lose Me.”  Picture yourself being crooned to by the Lover of your soul.  Feels good, doesn’t it? Ahh.  How marvelous the matchless love of our Saviour is.  Let’s bask in it for the rest of the day, shall we?  I think so too!

My Bold Buddy

Recently a friend of mine had an issue that needed to be taken care of--immediately, if not sooner.  Knowing only of One Who could handle this, he took his petition straight to the top, where he demanded that God take care of this.

But he didn’t stop there.  Not this friend.  Not only did he tell our sweet Father what it was he was in need of:  he demanded proof from Him that the mission had been accomplished.

Well, you know our great God just dropped everything to handle this, right?  I mean, after all, isn’t that what He’s there for:  to be our order taker so that we can have things our way, when we want them, and then be relegated back to His throne until next time?  I mean, after all, shouldn’t He have been keeping a better eye out anyways?  

As it just so happened, the God my friend and I serve did not jump when said friend spoke--even though the issue was one of possible severity and potential harm.  Maybe He was thinking back to those days when Mary and Martha fussed at Him, telling Him what He should do and/or should not have done so that their brother Lazarus wouldn’t have died.  Maybe God was recollecting the lesson taught and learned way back when.  If memory serves me correctly, didn’t He wait about two days or so before even responding in person to this call?  It wasn’t that the sisters’ need wasn’t great.  Oh no, friends, not at all.  Rather, Jesus lingered in Bethany for reasons many have supposed.  Basically, though, it just wasn’t time for Him to move.

So, back to my friend’s (ahem) “request.”  He sought a little assistance from an outside source or two.  He contacted them often to see if the evidence had been provided and when after several days it hadn’t, his prayers became more fierce, more intense.  He knew God could handle this tiny little matter in the grand scheme of things.  Though he was often a praying man, this incident had literally brought him to his knees, imploring God in a way he has rarely had to do.  

Lo and behold, guess what?  After a few days, when the time was right, my friend got the call he’d been waiting for.  Ta da!  The proof was provided without any doubt that the entire issue had been dealt with completely.  To say my pal was relieved would be an understatement!  As a matter of fact, after he profusely thanked our Good Lord for His provision, he did what any normal man would do:  he got mad.  At God!  Yeah, I know:  how dare he?  How dare this child question the manner in which God responded to his pleas?  The absolute gall!

Basically, this dear friend of mine told God that He had better not ever let that happen again.  When I questioned him why he would talk to God like that, his response was clear, concise, and one that made me question my own relationship with the Father.  He said he was selfish.  He didn’t want to take time away from his normal duties and cares to spend worrying about something that he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God could handle.  He was bold in his prayer, bold in his demand for evidence, and bold in his response.  I mean, after all, doesn’t God know us inside and out?  Doesn’t He know our thoughts before we speak them?  Doesn’t He know the cares and scares of this world before we even face them?  Doesn’t He know the end from the beginning?

Yes.  He does.  That must be one of the reasons He allowed the above verses to be favored ones throughout the ages.  Verses that teach us that:

Seeing then that we have a great High Priest Who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin.  Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.    

Mercy, grace, and help.  When we need.  One Who sympathizes with our weaknesses.  Yeah, that’s the God my friend serves.  He’s not intimidated by me and my smallness--not when He Himself is so great!  He’s not mad when I question Him.  He might laugh to Himself a little at some of my ridiculous demands but you know what?  In His time, He takes care of what needs cared for.  He provides evidence that what He began will be completed--in me and in others.  All in all, He’s a pretty special God, don’t you think?  

Let’s pray!

Thank You, Father, for answered prayers.  No, You don’t drop everything to tend to Your children’s cries because You have a plan and in Your wisdom, Lord God, You know when things need to come together.  

Sigh. I must confess:  I am often impatient with You much like my friend was.  But You already knew that, huh?  You already knew my petulant attitude does not serve me well nor reflect Christ-like behaviour.

Thank You for being God and for putting up with me.  And my friend.  May we honor You better after this lesson and the many more You teach us day by day is my prayer, asked in the healing name of Jesus Christ.  Amen.

Fraud Alert!!

I’m the kind of girl who has so many random thoughts or sees a great quote or finds a great Bible verse to later blog on or hears something I feel is worth repeating so I jot these things down on pieces of paper, in the backs of my many notebooks, or on writing pads that are nearby.  Every once in a while I try to go over them and see what they mean to me now, in a different light and on a different day.

Case in point:  as I came in my Pretty Purple Room this morning, there was a mess.  Here’s a pic to show you some of my small collection:

 

As you can see, there is much material to sort through.  However, as I came across the one prominently displayed, I was reminded of our church meeting last night, when Brother Brandon spoke to us on being careful that who we present to others in the world matches up with who we are in private.  I don’t know if you can see it on the note (or be able to read my horrible handwriting) but my note said “Fraud Alert.  Identity Theft.  How I wish I was constantly the woman behind the computer screen and didn’t revert back to the old me when my fingers are no longer typing.”  :(

Brandon’s words are echoing through my head this morning as I review this written thought from Lord knows when.  It’s easy to be so full of bubbly encouragement and truths and light when I am writing these words to you all but...but when I step out from behind this screen, are the folks who know me and read my blogs wondering who this chick thinks she is?  Do they question if my actions match up with my professions of faith when they encounter me in various circumstances?  Mostly though, I wonder if God--Who knows me inside and out--is pleased with the image I project in my daily walk.  Oh, I hope so, but I fear I fall short far too often.  

So, for those of you reading this, call me out when you see me erring.  Let me know--privately please--what I am doing wrong, right, and what could use some help.  Scripture tells us in Proverbs 27:17 that “Iron sharpens iron.”  Don’t let me be a vessel of rust that corrupts and corrodes.  As I continue to endeavour to share the love of Christ through this blog, my desire is to be a blessing.  I don’t want to just be a hearer of the Word; I want to be a doer.

Let’s pray!

Dear Lord, whew!  This was a tough one.  So many times I can feel like I am in Your perfect will and then bam!  Something happens to show my humanity and set me back a few paces.

Lord?  As I struggle with my wandering mind, I ask You to be that Guide for my pathway that was promised.  I ask that You continue working in me, perfecting me, and readying me for Your kingdom.  I long for Your words of “Well done, My faithful child.”  Prick me when I falter, I ask, in the name of Jesus.  Amen.

Somebody Touched Me!

She did it again.  This woman.  This marvelous woman that the Lord Jesus Christ saw fit to put in my world.  

It was a couple of weeks ago at Card Ministry.  My back was hurting and for some unknown reason (because I really don’t like folks to touch me much--it makes me feel all funny inside), as I stood beside her, I asked her to rub it. Without hesitation, she did.  And it wasn’t just one of those quickie-okay-I’ll-rub-your-back-for-one-minute-rubs.  No sir.  This lady proceeded to gently but firmly place her warm hand where I had shown her it hurt, and continued to make circles on my aching body until I let her know that that was good.

I didn’t think much about it until a week or so ago, when Steve and I were doing our Fruit of the Spirit study.  The word “kindness” came up and I immediately remembered this act that had been performed on me.  If you’re thinking to yourself at this point “What is the big deal, Stef?  Plenty of people have rubbed my back before and you don’t see me writing to tell the world.” then I would like you to take a moment and consider this verse from Matthew 8:3:

Jesus stretched out His hand and touched him, saying, "I am willing; be cleansed." And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.

While not a leper, many folks don’t touch me.  I guess it’s the aura I put out and most of the time it’s fine.  I mean sure, I get those friendly hugs as one circulates through the congregation at church from a few sweet women and occasionally from an older man.  The ones from the kiddos sure are sweet!  

I still didn’t think of it as such a big deal until on one of those Sundays, another lady approached me to shake my hand but...I could tell she was just doing it to be nice.  What she wanted to really do was get a hold of the woman beside of me and embrace her lovingly.  Her words of “My day just isn’t complete without a hug from you!” made my heart feel a pang as I thought “This woman doesn’t give me hugs!”  For some reason, it really bothered me.  Thus, the night Steve and I studied kindness, the back rub came back to mind.

What is it about the human touch?  That feeling of warmth that spreads through your whole body when another human being shares a part of self to connect with you?  Those random pats on the backs and shoulders?  The hearty handshakes when you can tell someone is really glad to see you? The oh-so-sweet gentle kisses on a cheek or the top of your head that seem to come from one who instinctively seems to know just how badly you needed that?

Jesus knew all about them.  That’s why He so freely gives them, gives of Himself.  He knows many of us feel unworthy, unlovable, unaccepted.  Many of the miracles He performed on others resulted first in Christ Jesus touching that one who was infirmed, making a connection, and showing His compassion.  Leper, blinded men, the deaf--all of these wounded felt the healing touch of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.  The ones most people had already rejected were healed by the Great Physician.  

So, back to my friend.  Did she have any clue what her rubbing of my back meant to me?  Probably not.  I’m sure many folks ask things of her that she freely gives without thinking twice about them.  That’s her nature:  to give of herself.  That’s Christ’s nature, exhibited in this dear soul and in so many of you.  So, the next time opportunity presents itself, reach out and touch someone.  Oh surely, though, do it in a helpful way and not a kick in the rear as many need (in our humble estimations) or a punch in the face as many are wont to do in today’s society.  You probably won’t realize how effective and powerful that simple kind gesture is but I daresay you will impact a life more than for the few seconds your touch lingers on them.

Let’s pray!

Dear Father, how I thank You for touch.  The sense of another soul reaching out without fear to share love is one of Your most wonderful gifts!  

Thank You for the example Your Son Jesus modeled for me.  May I use my fingers, my hands, and my light kisses on cheeks to bless others and remind them that You care about them even more than I do.  In the precious name of Jesus I pray this:  amen.

Hit me again, Ike

“Where would Tina Turner be right now if she'd rolled over and said, ‘Hit me again, Ike,

and put some stank on it!’? Rollin' on the river, that's where she'd be.”

Where does your inspiration come from?  Old movies?  Songs?  Books?  People?  The Bible?  I would have to say mine come from all of the above.

Take this morning for example.  Steve and I were having our breakfast and I was relating to him about this person on Facebook.  The posts this person--let's call him "Ike" for now--puts up often have the tendency to irk me.  Ike often posts things that are rarely positive; some would even say they are whiny and derogatory to his employer.  The more I told Steve about his comments, the more upset Steve himself got over the silliness and outrageousness of it. Upset isn't quite the right word; irate would be better.  No, that's too strong. Maybe just plain old fed up would best suffice.

Anyway, he says to me, "Can't you just unfollow this person?  They wouldn't know if you did, right:  Facebook doesn't notify them that they are not being followed?"

I said I could but when certain of my friends comment on Ike's page, it shows up in my feed.  His oh-so-wise response that he didn't know would be the spark to set my wandering fingers ablaze this morning with this blog?  "Can't you just un-feed it?"

Whoa!

The tangents my mind took off on as I instantly thought of how many things in my life would not be so pesky and irksome if they just weren't fed!  For instance, you know how Facebook likes to send you those "On This Day" reminders of what happened this time last year, two years ago, and so on?  Things like on this day my mother died in 2012 (as though I needed to be reminded of that).  

Oh the flames that are ignited when I allow myself to dwell on all the angst, hurt, pain, and betrayal that that incident brought up.  Oh sure, there were also some great things that happened on September 3 throughout my lifetime and those things are fondly remembered but honestly, each day in this feed, it seems as though there is something there to try to steal my hard-fought for joy.  And if it's not "On This Day," then there is someone who posts a meme, a quote, a prayer request for whatever family functions and dysfunctions are going on to remind me of my own affairs.

So, what am I saying?  Am I proposing giving up Facebook so that there's not always something there to remind me of past trials?  Hmn.  It surely would eliminate a lot of my random thoughts and keep me less involved (and thereby less likely to be made aware of things that really--in all honesty--don't concern me).  It would free up many moments in my day to better use to pursue happier and more productive thoughts.  In truth, it would probably be one of the smartest things I could do: to unfeed my mind and life of inconsequential things and events.

But...

But, maybe I'm more like the meme I posted above.  Maybe I'm a closet masochist?  Maybe--like was proposed by Fletcher in the "Liar Liar" movie--maybe I enjoy being hit again and again with hurt--and while you're at it, put some stank on it?  I mean, truthfully, if it bothered me enough, wouldn't I quit exposing myself to it?  Wouldn't I unfeed this hungry shark that is never satisfied, never fulfilled, never gets enough of the misery that feeds its appetite?

Sigh.

But there's more to the quote I used this morning from Jim Carrey's dialogue here.  He follows it with "Wake up, Sisters!  There's no such thing as a weaker sex."

Read these words that Jesus told Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:

But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Hmn.  I can surely relate to the weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and difficulties Paul was writing about.  Can't you, friends?  So, while it'd probably be one of the smarter things to do--to give up Facebook, I mean--I don't believe I will.  Even though it has the tendency to reveal things to me that were previously unknown, it also only has as much power as I allow it to.  So, yeah Steve, I will "unfeed" some folks' pages.  I will unfollow more that I know are often ones who just bring me down with their own miserableness.  I won't purposely seek out their posts to see what's new with them.  After all, if it was any of my business, I'd probably already be privy to it, don't you think?  I think so too!

Let's pray!

Dear Lord...

Heavy sigh.

Father?  Thank You for once again showing me a better way.  Who knew a simple word like "unfeed" would open my eyes to something so easy to do, something that should be obvious to begin with, and something that definitely needs to be tended to in my life?  I'm a slow learner and it takes me a while, Lord, to realize what others have known for longer.  Thanks for being tolerant with me and helping me to make the necessary changes that will make me...better?  More like You?  

Yeah.  That is the ultimate goal, right?  You promised to perfect me and even though it may be taking more time than You originally planned, the race is still being run.  Fulfill Your will in me, I pray, in the name of Jesus.  Amen.