That's What Friends Are For!

Two are better than one, because...if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.

Last night was a time of affirmation.  Let me rephrase that:  last night was a time of much-needed affirmation!

I’ve been in a rut lately and my soul has been burdened.  While it’s nice to be able to share these things with the hubby, I was able yesterday to speak with two folks who really got me.  I mean, they didn’t just nod their heads in understanding while looking for the nearest exit.  They not only confirmed my feelings but had nearly equal ones in response!  Do you know how good that feels--to know you aren’t crazy, to know that while your spouse agrees with you because, after all, you’ve been married so long that your thoughts often mirror the others’, and to know that all things work together for good?  If you don’t, my hope is that you will be able to go out on that limb and risk it.  Either you’ll break the tree because your weight is too much for it or you’ll find that when Christ is the vine and we are the branches, love covers all.  Rooted and grounded in Him, we can remain steadfast.

Let’s pray!

Dear Lord, thank You for brothers and sisters in Christ who are there when needed.  Thank You for the fellowship, the compassion, and the love You placed in our hearts towards each other, in spite of the world trying to convince us that we are on our own.  We aren’t.

Father?  My heart is still heavy and while it was nice to share, the answers weren’t there.  These friends didn’t have them, as they too were searching for the best avenue to take.  Will You help us--both individually and corporately--to keep seeking Your Word to find what we need?  Thanks.

Lastly, Lord, I pray for those out there who feel alone, uncared for, unheard.  I ask that You send someone their way to see their souls, to hear what’s not being said, and to respond to the cries for help that don’t make it past the eyes.  I ask these things in the name of Christ Jesus, my Redeemer and my Advocate.  Amen.

Consolation to Condemnation

I’d like to share with you a couple of things I’m learning from my study of the Book of Job.  Currently, Steve and I just finished chapter eight and I must say, there’s a lot of Job--and unfortunately, his friends--in me.

For those not familiar with this book, Job was an upright man that was considered by Satan to be tested for his faith in God.  God permitted this trial and the results are ones left for those of us who often wonder why He allows “good people” to suffer.  After losing all of his worldly possessions and his family, Job had three friends come by to commiserate with him.  And here’s where today’s blog lesson starts.

Job’s friends heard of his calamity and did what most try to do when disaster strikes:  they showed up.  However, unlike most in today’s time, these pals came to Job and sat with him for seven days.  Seven days!  No talking, no advice, no offers of help.  They just sat with him, speaking no words.  Goodness!  Can you imagine doing this for seven minutes?  I cannot but these buddies?  They did it for seven days!!  They shared with Job their presence when his grief must have surely been unbearable.

I wonder about them as they sat there.  Did they make lots of mental notes for the words that would soon come from their mouths?  Did they surreptitiously draw pictures in the sand to remind them to bring up such and such story so that when the time came, they wouldn’t leave anything out?  Oh, the memories they must have had!  Job had seven sons and three daughters and I am sure they left numerous impressions upon these beloved “adopted uncles” of theirs.

But here’s the point for today that I want to share with you:  Job’s friends went from consoling their crony to (gulp!) condemning him, his children, and his actions.  “If you had done this, Job,” or “If your son had not sinned so,” to “What did you do to God, Job?” and “If it was me, I would have…” blah blah blah.  Wow:  what an abrupt change of tone, huh?  One day they are sitting around crying with Job over these unfathomable losses and before too long, they are adding to his woes by berating him over what he had done wrong, what his kids did to bring on their untimely deaths, what sins he must repent over to get God’s blessings back, and so many more utterances that it still makes my head spin.  As if we could do anything to win God’s favor!  But that’s another story.  

I’ll close with this nugget of gold I received from portions of these first chapters of Job.  For you see, I am guilty of this type of behavior too.  When someone I care about has suffered a loss--whether a family member, a job, a friendship, or what have you--I am ashamed to admit it but I too often wonder what their part in this was to bring such sadness into their lives.  Maybe if they didn’t show so much cleavage in their Facebook pictures they could have attracted the right sort of man instead of that loser.  Perhaps if they had disciplined their kids better then they wouldn’t have gotten into so much trouble.  If they were more spiritual instead of being so religious then maybe they wouldn’t have lost their position.  The money foolishly spent on “I-gotta-have-it-now” items would have come in handy for the phone bill.  The list could go on and on.

Instead of saying these things out loud, shouldn’t I be praying for my friends, for their needs, and for their spiritual growth?  Shouldn’t I be silent about this for at least seven days, like Job’s friends were, instead of opining my great wisdom and offering unasked for advice?  Yeah, I think so too.  Keeping one’s mouth shut and controlling the tongue before unsolicited “help” comes out would save this world a lot of grief rather than adding to it.  Spiritual duct tape, cover my mouth is my prayer today.

Dear Lord, for all the times I condemned instead of consoled, I humbly ask forgiveness.  Yes, most of it was in my mind but Lord?  I shouldn’t let such negativity invade a time of need when my beloved is hurting.  S/he doesn’t need my words, only my presence, my pats of understanding, my shared tears, my silence.  I’m sure the devil is giving enough grief to this soul without me adding to the guilt being offered by him.  Help me control my tongue and my thoughts, I ask, Lord so that I may be a blessing and not a blight.  In the name of Jesus Christ I ask these things:  amen.

The Comforter Abides With Me

It appears to be all the rage nowadays.  Service animals.  It seems I cannot go hardly anywhere these days without some sort of animal being in my vicinity.  Honestly?  It makes me mad.  I don’t like animals on a good day and I certainly don’t want them where I am shopping for groceries, roaming the aisles next to me in other stores, and definitely do not want them in my space while I am eating out at a restaurant.  I don’t think they are cute, adorable in their little outfits, nor do I stop and pet them and ooh and ahh over them.  

Now please, don’t get me wrong.  I am not referring to the animals who are genuinely needed to assist handicapped folks--such as the blind and those who suffer from seizures.  But those who are around for “emotional support” and “comfort” I have quite the opposite opinion about.  They aren’t even slightly regulated by the ones who bring them in.  No leashes, no confinement brace.  They roam freely and make me antsy as I wonder just how well--if at all--they have been trained.  On Saturday, at Lowe’s, this woman was getting a buggy as Steve and I were getting ready to enter the store.  She put her two little dogs in there and I just sighed.  Then, as we got into the store itself and there were two employees standing there, I was curious as to how this would be handled.  There was a sign saying service animals are allowed but this?  Well, you tell me.  

The woman came in all in a gush as she raved to the men, “They just had to come to Lowe’s again.  It’s their favorite store!  They get mad at me when I don’t bring them here at least once a week.”  Oh my cow.  Is she serious?  I’ve heard of dog whisperers and such but really:  they will pout and not love her if she doesn’t bring them to the store?  Do they have a doggie allowance to spend on indoor supplies to make their lives better?  Will they unfriend her on Facebook if she refuses to take them where they want to go?

Sigh.  

I tried to let my sweet Stef think about this for a moment.  I wondered what loss this woman may have suffered in her life that made her need these animals to give all of her affection to.  I pondered if she had a lonely life that made her revolve her whole world around them.  I even asked myself if she indeed did have a condition that required her to have these canines with her at all times so that she wouldn’t fall apart.  

Okay, this probably isn’t going over well with you animal lovers and my intention is not to upset you nor start a debate on this topic.  Instead, I want to share with you my Comforter.  No, He’s not a service animal and I don’t keep Him on a leash.  He isn’t registered nor does He have any papers to prove He’s necessary in my life.  Oh wait:  yes He does!  They’re called the pages of my Bible.  Why, just a few moments ago as I was reading, I couldn’t help but caress the softness of the pages.  I must say, it was indeed a comfort to feel the power beneath my fingertips as my eyes absorbed the truths and promises and instructions for my daily living.  The familiarity of the passage I was reading brought me a peace, a solace, and I just sat there for a few moments rubbing them and letting them soak into me.  

Oh how I wish others could take advantage of this Comforter!  The need for outside remedies is at a high point as prescriptions are written daily for nerves, fears, and help in dealing with life.  Jesus said:  And I will pray the Father, and He shall give you another Comforter, that He may abide with you for ever…

Oh Lord God, how we turn to so many other things to try to give us the consolation that only You can fill in us!  Lord?  Here’s what I ask for today:  I ask that You strengthen Your men and women who know better and grant them a boldness to speak to others about You.  May our lips sing Your praises and tell others about Your healing powers.  May we be gentle, yes, but may we stop avoiding the real issues our friends and loved ones are going through and just ask, just talk to them, instead of brushing them aside as we stay caught up in our own miseries.  We don’t have to be miserable!  We don’t have to fear, to fret, to wonder what tomorrow holds.  You abide in us, Lord, and it’s time we start acting like it!

May we rejoice in You today and may our lights so shine that Jesus is all that is seen is my earnest prayer, asked in His reassuring name, amen.