Distracted by God

As I lie here on the beachfront, soaking up some rays, listening to the crashing waves, the distant laughter, and gently greeting those who pass by, a song is going through my head.

The intention was to come out here for a nap and then go play in the pool, take a walk along the beach, and relax.  So I positioned myself just right, adjusted my towel to protect my face from the warm sun, and closed my eyes, thinking what a good time it would be to commune with God.  That song continued in my head.

♫"Can't we try just a little bit harder?
Can't we give just a little bit more?
Can't we try to understand that it's love we're fighting for?"  ♫

"Man," I thought, "why can't I be distracted by Jesus as easily as I am by the world?  Why can't my attention stray to Him as much as to this helicopter flying overhead?"

Two people walk by and my mind wonders what they're up to.  The waves continue crashing.  The wind gently glides over me.

"Is that You, Lord?" my mind whispers.  "Is that Your Spirit soothing me, covering me?"  

I look around and see a seagull flying close by.

"Is that You, Lord, waving Your wings at me, reminding me how I am sheltered beneath them?"

A lady struggles to open the gate to get back into the resort and I think "One day I will meet You, Lord, in the morning, just inside the Eastern Gate."

Distracted by God.  Focusing on Him in all that surrounds me, whether that be by sight or by sound.  "Fill me, I pray, dear Lord!"  

I close my journal and place it back in my beach bag.  I stretch my hand over and feel it encompassed by Steve and am lastly reminded that God too holds me with His hand.  I sigh, close my eyes, and rest.

A Lot of Love

What makes us love someone?  What is it about one that we would give up our selves for?  What characteristics are we seeing that few others do?  Though they betray us, use and abuse us, take advantage of us, and hurt us to no end, when they throw a crumb our way, we devour it as though our very lives depend upon that morsel.  And then, we get introduced to Jesus, the very One Who really showed us what love is and what love can be.  For many, this revelation is too much to bear and yet something won't be denied about it and they are drawn to Him, basing their lives around Him, and doing all they can to please this One Who is so worthy.  But for others, for those who don't know or understand compassion, who don't know that love doesn't have to hurt, or that love heals the wounds left by the ones we foolishly gave ourselves to, such love is hard to understand and even if we did, we feel we aren't worthy.  No one has ever put us first nor given so freely on our behalves.

I've been cheated

Been mistreated

When will I be loved?

I've been put down

I've been pushed 'round

When will I be loved?

Ever felt this way, friends?  Ever felt no one gave a rip about you and that all you do is give give give and all others do is take take take?  Not a great feeling, is it?  But what about that other feeling you get sometimes?  Some would call it jealousy and while it definitely involves envy I think there is much more to it, more of a longing to be so cared for that someone would do anything--and I do mean anything--to have you in his life?

In Sunday School, we have been going through the book of Genesis and are up to the part of Abraham and Lot.  Remember him--Lot, I mean?  He was the guy who was Abraham's nephew, the one who took advantage of his uncle's kindnesses and chose the best land for himself when their cattle needed to have more room.  He was also the guy who began to pull away from his righteous uncle and set his sights on Sodom, and eventually moved there.  He was held captive and his uncle risked many men to save him and what did Lot do to show his gratitude?  Kept living in this wicked city that he'd been saved from and wound up nearly throwing his pure virginal daughters to its depraved men in order to keep his home safe.

Through it all, Abraham had his eye on Lot and his heart was spent in much prayer for this wayward nephew.  At this time, Abraham didn't have any children so maybe that's why he devoted himself so his brother's son.  I remember doing that--focusing my heart and all the love in it for my sister's first born.  Oh, how I loved that child and would do anything for her!  I stayed up nights taking care of her when she'd cry.  I spent my free time babysitting her when I could have been out in the world having my own fun.  I hurt when she hurt and when she moved away for a time, I was devastated, feeling as though part of me was missing.  Then, when my Steve and I married and waited for the arrival of our own bundle of joy, this niece of ours was...not a substitute by any means!  But she was our fun.  She completed our little circle and went everywhere with us her mom would allow.  Through the years, we loved and lived much of our lives around her.  I guess you'd say she was our first love and we cherished her like none other that we'd ever been exposed to before.  We would have done anything for that child.

As I pondered yesterday why Lot would have so much love for this nephew, I couldn't help but think of another's love.  For me.  For you.  For the lost sheep in His pasture.  His first love.  The one He'd do anything for--including becoming a  human That would suffer the utmost shame and humiliation, Who would give up His home in glory so that we might one day live there with Him, Who would be mocked, scorned, beaten, and denied just so I could be His bride.

My sister (not the same one who provided me with my first niece) once loved this guy.  He was her world.  She gave up her family, her home, her pride, her body, her sanity for him.  Time and time again he threw it in her face--or her sides where he'd kick her.  Or in her belly when she was carrying his second child.  He'd steal from her, wreck her cars that she worked so hard to obtain, leave her, come back to her, beat her again, and the vicious dysfunctional cycle just kept spinning round and around until one day she finally came to her senses.  But her love for him was so deep, so embedded in her, that it took many days for the realization to hit home (pardon the pun) and she saw that this love was not healthy, was not right, nor was it what she and her daughters needed nor deserved.

Sigh.

Friends, sisters and brothers in Christ, we have got to show this world real love, love like the Father has for His children.  Love that knows no bounds but in the right way, not in the way that causes shame, leaves scars, nor wounds us beyond repair.  We cannot show favoritism and choose one over another.  After all, consider yourselves.  Somebody saw something pretty special about you, now didn't He?  Jesus Christ chose you--you!!  Wonder of wonders, He also chose me and as such, this generous, undeserved gift must be shared.  I can't repay it but I can definitely tell others my story of His amazing grace and unending love.

Throughout my life the devil has stolen much from me and had me believing I'd never find love, never have someone choose me first or even want me on their team.  Even when God sent me Steve all those years ago, I still had a nagging in my heart that one day he'd leave; that one day even his sweet supply of love, forgiveness, and acceptance would run dry.  Those lies caused mistrust and kept us from a closerness (yeah, I made up another new word) to God and to one another because of the doubt that I allowed to fill my soul.  While I did that, it was slowly and steadily being replaced by Christ's love for me and though my earthly eyes often fail me and my hearing doesn't always allow me to get it the first time, my spiritual eyes are being opened and my heavenly ears are tuned to another's voice, one that doesn't lie or whisper that I'm not good enough.  Through the blood of Jesus, I am righteous and one day I shall see Him, be enveloped in His arms, and behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed upon me.  Will I see you there too?

Let's pray!

Thank You, Father God, for such a love.  I cannot fathom it, cannot explain it, and cannot have it taken from me.  My election is sure and I am so thankful, Lord, that You saw something in me worth saving.  May I honor You with the sacrifices made for me with my life is my prayer today.  In the sweet name of Jesus I pray it, amen.

Shouldn't you be minding your own business instead of mine?

"Ma'am, can I ask you a question?" He looked at me, trying not to be embarrassed.  "I hate to be nosy but..." He hesitated as I looked at him, knowing what he was going to say next.  "Did you have surgery on your nose?"

He looked at me with such concern, both for my well-being and in case he had offended me.

I smiled at him and said I had.  He asked if it was because of skin cancer and I replied yes.  We went on to talk of the procedure I had done, had it hurt, did it hurt still, and then--this is key--then he mentioned his wife had found a spot on her nose and was going to have to see the doctor for more treatment on it.

"Big deal, Stef.  We all know you had this done.  We asked about you too.  What makes him so special?"

Can I answer you back in the most loving of ways?  The difference with this man was he asked about me.  He asked about my pain, my procedure, my experience.  He didn't butt in with his own horror tales or to tell me of his Uncle Herman's wife's sister's cousin who had cancer of another sort and how we needed to pray for them.  He asked about me.  He wanted to know about me.  He cared about me.  This stranger in Food Lion that I'll probably never see again took time out of his busy day to confront someone that he felt compelled to offer some sympathy to.

How often, friends, do we hear of another's woes and interrupt that soul to tell of our own miseries?  Do we do this to commiserate with him/her or are we just really so self-centered that we have to have the focus on us all of the time?  Please please please don't take this wrong but instead do this:  the next time you see or hear of someone who is sick, in the hospital, or has fallen on hard times, ask that person if it hurts, if it is okay now, and if not, is there something you can do.  Show this person that you are willing to give two minutes of your time to hear, to listen to the grief s/he is going through.  After all, isn't that what you really want too:  someone to just listen?  Not offer advice, not quote scriptures to you, not tell you about the malpractice suits filed against the doctors three states over for some mishap regarding Aunt Bertha's neighbor's friend Junie--who by the way we need to pray for because that one is in such a state.  Seriously?

Let's stop the gossip.  Let's stop comparing war wounds.  Let's just be still.  Pat that hurting one's hand.  Look him/her in the eye and show your love and concern.  Ask if there's anything you can do--'cause you know pretty much s/he isn't going to ask, that you just listening for these precious moments meant more than any casserole, any "putting you on the prayer list," or any other thing that put you in the limelight instead of the injured one.

1 Corinthians 12:17

If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole were hearing, where would the sense of smell be?

Be nosy, sisters and brothers.  Let's take care of our other body parts, friends.  We need each part to function.  Let's be sure to give the care needed where it is needed, okay?  Great!

My Condition

As I sit here, waiting for my biopsy to come back, I wonder. I wonder at the marvels of medical technology. The doctor comes in, numbs me up, and takes out the obvious bad stuff. He's already explained the process and the follow up cosmetic surgery that he'll perform afterwards, depending of course on if he has to go in again.

I wonder. I wonder about that. How much more is in there that he wasn't able to get the first time. Will he open me up again-- and maybe even again? The surface stuff is easy to reach. But what about the deeper cancers, the ones that don't want to let go? The ones that the surgeon has to dig deeper for? The ones that keep hanging on?

Sounds like my sin condition. Some of the lesser ones are so easy to fix but others? Others I wonder if a cure is out there. Like the nurse who just came in and told me another layer was going to have to be taken, some of us need more extensive care. But guess what? The nurse had me confused with another patient. My fears swelled and doubt and despair arose and then fell in the blink of an eye. Oh how easy to think we get rid of it all at once and then how reality hits us hard when we see more work needs to be done.

Sigh. My sins aren't a secret to God. He knows my infirmity and my need to be cleansed and healed--often. One visit with Him won't do it. I need to be in constant communication with Him, need to practice and exercise the lessons taught, need to have regular check ups. "Search me, oh God," the psalmist pleads. "Cleanse me from every sin and set me free."

Me too, Lord. Me too.

Dad, I Need Your Help

There are three commands in this verse:  come, obtain, and find.  As you read, these are verbs that are going to take a little action, so let's get off of our duffs this morning and get to them, shall we?

Long years ago, I was a child growing up in a home that had a domineering father.  Maybe it was his military background or perhaps he just liked to be in control, but whatever the case, he was a hard man.  I lived in perpetual fear of doing something to upset the apple cart because his wrath was one I did not like to have fall upon me.  But because I too was a girl with determination, there were times when I would risk the fist of iron and go to him in search of what I needed:  my allowance, permission to go to the skating rink, and a ride from him to get there.  Same three things as the verse tells?  Almost.  

My dad had a sense of humor that most didn't think was funny.  Often, he liked to see my siblings and I beg for those things we wanted.  He'd agree we deserved our allowance after laboring so hard in the tobacco field.  He'd concur that it was Friday night and we should get to have some fun.  But the last part, how we'd get to said event?  Oh, that was the one he liked to see us squirm about.  Maybe it was to see how badly we truly wanted to go?  Maybe it was so we'd all agree to go to the same place (my sisters often tended to want to go to the ball games instead of the skating rink--and the school was a mile further up the road).  Who knows?  But by the time he finished toying with us and decided he'd take us, it was nearly the time for the place to open.  I don't know about you but there were three of us girls and one shower (kind of like the Brady Bunch).  Because of the grime of the field, obviously we all needed to clean up and since I was the youngest, there were times when I literally held my head out of the window of that old green station wagon in an effort to get my hair to dry on the way to our adventure because my time had been so limited in the bathroom and I didn't want to be the one to hold us up.

Sigh.  That tone, that attitude of having to plead for a simple favor shadowed my dealings with my Lord for much of my life.  If I wanted Him to do something on my behalf, I could almost feel His glare, His anger, as He considered whether or not I was even worthy to ask such a thing of Him.  Yet, as mentioned above, I was stubborn too so I would barter with God.  "Lord, if You will do this, I will do (or not do) such and such."  I'd beg of Him to grant me this request and wait like a cowering cat to see if He'd oblige me.  I'd try to reason with Him that I had earned or deserved to have this one thing.  And I'd curl up in a ball waiting to see if He'd answer me.

What a sad child I was!  The fear of God came from my own fear of my dad and it has taken many years to change this negative way of thinking into one where I may now come boldly to Him when I need--and I need often!  How did it happen?  Thanks for asking!  When I became a parent, I often found myself unconsciously modeling the behavior patterns of my parents.  But the more I watched my husband, the more I saw how his parents and aunt and uncle responded to my daughter's needs, the more I became aware that I had had it wrong about God.  When my child needed help--whether it was with homework, learning a new skill, or just some advice--she had no trouble going to her daddy to get these things.  She wasn't afraid of him; she adored him!  He rarely told her "no" to those things she desired--unless it was for her own good.  She didn't have to barter with him, nor did she have to shy away from asking for the hard stuff in fear of being mocked or scorned.  Nope.  She just went to him.  She presented her requests in a normal, conversational tone.  And she didn't wait expectantly:  she expected an immediate response.  This was her dad and she was his child.  Why would he not give her what she wanted, needed, or maybe just "had to have" for whatever reason?

Do you see it friends?  God is not our enemy.  He is not our fearsome leader Who has to have had an appointment set before He can find time in His busy world for us to commune with Him.  He isn't up on His throne waiting to mock us or ridicule us when we ask some wild things of Him.  Instead, He is our Daddy, our  Abba.  He delights in us, and wants to give us the desires of our hearts--especially when they line up with His will for our lives.

Go to Him.  Don't be afraid.  Ask Him for what you need--no matter if it is spiritual, financial, or on the behalf of another.  Don't mince your words and don't hem and haw.  Be bold.  Be forthright.  Be confident that what you ask of Him He has the power to fulfill.  Will He always say "yes" to what you want?  Of course not!  He knows better than we do what the result would be if He gave us everything we think we want!  But I tell you what:  He will listen.  He will consider you.  He will give you what you need even though it might be different than what you asked for.  He's merciful that way.  His grace is all sufficient.  And I have it on good authority that you have not because you ask not.  Go tell God what you need today.  I'll bet He'd love to hear from you!

Let's pray!

Dear Sweet Father, thank You for loving Your children and teaching us that perfect love casts out fear.  Thank You for showing us that Your ways are higher than ours.  Thank You for always being available when we need, when we want, and when we take the time to pencil You into our busy schedules.  

As Your kids come to You today--some on behalf of me!!--bless them.  Show them more powerfully than before that You hear them, that You love them, and that You want to be their "Go To Guy."  Thank You so much for loving us!!  We love You too!!!  In the name of Jesus, amen.

You Should See The Other Guy

Good morning!  It's been nearly a week since my last blog.  I just couldn't find the words to write that would help me to express the meandering thoughts wandering through my mind.  Yeah, I was still recovering from my hateful cold, trying to reconcile the thoughts about my sister-in-law's passing, my everyday issues, and oh yeah:  my fears about the skin cancers growing in my head.

"What's it like inside the bubble?  Does your head ever give you trouble?  It's no sin; trade it in.  Hang on:  help is on its way!"  

The Little River Band crooned this song way back when and it's one of my favorites.  However, I don't know of a soul who would trade my head, my mind, for theirs.  

The chorus of the song goes like this:  

Hang on, help is on its way
I'll be there as fast as I can
"Hang on," a tiny voice did say
From somewhere deep inside the inner man

Hmn.  Kind of reminds me of this verse from Jeremiah 30:17 that goes like this:

 But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds,’ declares the Lord, 

"A tiny voice" could also be described as a still, small voice, correct?  "From deep inside the inner man" could refer to our soul.  These lyrics combined with the promise, the declaration of God when He said He "will restore you to health and heal your wounds" gives me much joy.  Help is on His way, as is restoration.  Whatever the cancer is inside of us, friends, God is there to heal us.  For you see, cancer is defined as:  a practice or phenomenon perceived to be evil or destructive and hard to contain or eradicate.  For me, my mind is a constant battlefield, and the disease of self is rampant in it.  Add to that my physical infirmities and I am indeed a man in need of a Saviour.  

Let's face it:  we all have our stories of heartbreak and disillusionment.  We all have our private pains--whether physical, emotional, or both.  The trick is how we deal with them.  The comfort of sharing our stories and having others pray for and with us is unspeakable.  The satisfaction of the good reports when those prayers are answered is a relief like none other.  

Like me, the scars left behind will be evident for a while.  I was hesitant to post this picture but I did so to remind me, to leave a vivid portrait of what cancer does.  While it is a horrid disease and has claimed far too many loved ones throughout the ages, it can be contained.  It can be eradicated.  The Great Physician can take His holy blade and cut it from our hearts, our bodies, and our spirits.  It doesn't have to destroy us.  Does it hurt, when He takes our yuck out?  Sure.  Unfortunately, for those sins that are so deep, there isn't a numbing shot to dull the effects as the knife does its handiwork.  There aren't pain pills for the upcoming hurt nor is there a bandage to hide the hideousness left behind.  But there is a Comforter nearby to hold our hands.  There is a Listener Who wants to hear our sorrows rather than interrupting us to share His own war stories when we just need someone to hear us grieve.  And there is that wonderful promise He gave us when He said He'd never leave us nor forsake us and that He'd restore us.

As I conclude, my mind is already jumping ahead to next week when I go have my stitches removed and get to repeat this operation for another part of my body that has been cancer stricken.  Isn't that the way it goes?  We get one area of our lives under control and then another is waiting, biding its time to damage other areas of our bodies?  These consequences from previous bad behaviors and/or choices that led to this sickness cannot be changed, cannot be undone.  What can happen though is that the stimulus can be contained, can be refrained from being committed again, and can be avoided when proper diligence is paid to be holy.  And yes, I know there will be some times when things happen that I have no control over as I am tested again physically and emotionally as the devil continues trying to kill, destroy, and steal my joy.  That's when in my weakness, I must allow Jesus Christ to be strong in me.  My hope is that you will make this choice as well.

Let's pray!

Dear Lord, thank You.  Thank You for the cancers in me.  No, I am not glad they are there but the lessons You teach me through them show how much I need You.  They show the ugliness of this world and point me to the promise of the one to come where there is no sickness, no pain, no dying.  The day is coming when You will have the final victory, Lord, and it can't come soon enough!

For my friends, loved ones, and those I do not know who are suffering from cancer, from loneliness, from heartbreak, and from stolen joy, I pray that You will be their strength today.  Father, I pray that You will embrace them so tightly and securely that they cannot help but sing in the midst of their struggles, cannot help but praise Your name for the wonderful Saviour You are, and cannot help but share their stories with others so that they too can point others to You.

Lord God, I love you.  I appreciate You.  I anticipate the day I get to meet You face to face.  Until then, keep me.  Settle me.  Still me.  Love me.  In the name of Jesus I pray.  Amen.

 

That's What I Said!

Have you ever searched for just the right words to say, to describe what you are feeling--to no avail?  And then, voila`!  You come across it in a letter or devotion or just happen to overhear it somewhere.

The past few days--ahh, scratch that.  This past year has been a tough one for me, both emotionally and physically.  And it just so happens, there are 56 days left.  Wonder what they will hold for me?  For you?  For our nation?  

Friends, I don't have the answers nor do I always have the right words to say to bring comfort, encouragement, nor to advise those who ask for my help.  Like the psalmist in chapter 6 of the Book of Psalms, though, I am not afraid to cry out to The One Who does.  I know Who is sitting calmly on His throne, not vexed, not troubled, not wringing His hands in agony nor indecision.  For you see, He already has the whole world in His hands.  He's already laid it out on His timetable and even better, He knows the end from the beginning!

So, if like me, you sometimes find yourself discouraged, hurting, and maybe even bewildered, take a few moments and read over this scripture.  You may want to find you need more than a kindred spirit.  If so, read the rest of the chapter.  I think you will find just the answer needed--not necessarily what you wanted to hear, but what you need.  And isn't that what is important?  I think so too!


Psalm 6:2

New International Version
Have mercy on me, LORD, for I am faint; heal me, LORD, for my bones are in agony.
New Living Translation
Have compassion on me, LORD, for I am weak. Heal me, LORD, for my bones are in agony.
English Standard Version
Be gracious to me, O LORD, for I am languishing; heal me, O LORD, for my bones are troubled.
New American Standard Bible 
Be gracious to me, O LORD, for I am pining away; Heal me, O LORD, for my bones are dismayed.
King James Bible
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
Holman Christian Standard Bible
Be gracious to me, LORD, for I am weak; heal me, LORD, for my bones are shaking; 
International Standard Version
Be gracious to me, LORD, because I am fading away. Heal me, because my body is distressed.
NET Bible
Have mercy on me, LORD, for I am frail! Heal me, LORD, for my bones are shaking! 
Aramaic Bible in Plain English
Have mercy upon me Lord Jehovah because I am sick; heal me, Lord Jehovah, because my bones are troubled.
GOD'S WORD® Translation
Have pity on me, O LORD, because I am weak. Heal me, O LORD, because my bones shake with terror.
JPS Tanakh 1917
Be gracious unto me, O LORD, for I languish away; Heal me, O LORD, for my bones are affrighted.
New American Standard 1977 
Be gracious to me, O LORD, for I am pining away; 
            Heal me, O LORD, for my bones are dismayed.
Jubilee Bible 2000
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak; O LORD, heal me, for my bones are troubled.
King James 2000 Bible
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are troubled.
American King James Version
Have mercy on me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
American Standard Version
Have mercy upon me, O Jehovah; for I am withered away: O Jehovah, heal me; for my bones are troubled.
Douay-Rheims Bible
Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak: heal me, O Lord, for my bones are troubled. 
Darby Bible Translation
Be gracious unto me, Jehovah, for I am withered; Jehovah, heal me, for my bones tremble.
English Revised Version
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am withered away: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
Webster's Bible Translation
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are agitated.
World English Bible
Have mercy on me, Yahweh, for I am faint. Yahweh, heal me, for my bones are troubled.
Young's Literal Translation
Favour me, O Jehovah, for I am weak, Heal me, O Jehovah, For troubled have been my bones,

White Lies

It happened last week during a celebratory supper.  The adults were talking about the highs and lows of the day and the kiddos were playing with their chips and salsa--and silverware, straws, and anything else they could get their sticky little fingers on.  I was going on about how this fella who hadn't done his job properly did do at least one thing right, but probably just so he could C Y A.

"What's C Y A mean," asked this screechy voice.

As my eyes met the other female's at the table in chagrin, without hardly missing a beat, I replied "Well, the 'C' is for 'see' and the 'YA' is for 'ya' as in see ya later."

The lie just rolled, ever so easily, off of my tongue and I kept on with the conversation while mentally I was berating myself for not only not being careful but for following up one misdeed with another.  I've been pondering the incident ever since.

Today, in order to avoid chatting too long on the phone, I purposely made my voice more scratchy than it is so that I could get back to resting.  Was that a lie?  Weeeellllll, it wasn't being honest, now was it, by me misleading the one on the other end of the phone that I wasn't well enough to discourse for but a minute?  Or, when instead of responding to a friend's cry for help on social media, instead I turned a deaf ear, convincing myself that I couldn't be much use to her in my fuzzy condition.  She probably just needed someone to listen anyways:  not someone to drone on with opinions and advice.  I could have at least offered.  But I didn't.

Sins of omission and sins that are deliberately committed.  I am guilty of doing both and what's worse is that I really don't feel too badly about them.  Not at first, anyways.  Obviously that can't still be true or I wouldn't be blogging about them now, would I?  Sigh.  Oh wretched woman that I am!  In my miserable condition, often I just want to burrow and keep the world at bay.  And the days when I am healthy and in my as-much-as-can-be right mind when I have better control and cannot blame my poor behavior on the medication?  What excuse can I offer then?

Romans 7:19
For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing.
Galatians 5:17
For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.

Isn't it great that Paul, this great man of faith, failed before me and penned these verses?   Isn't it comforting to know that no matter how rotten I am, there are those whose own stench made them humble themselves and seek pardon and gain restoration so that I would know how to do so too?  To realize that when I mess up, someone before me has also misspoken, given in to desires that should have been left alone, and/or has battled within himself to stop the madness?  

For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.  What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? 

 Ahh, the comfort of not being alone in our wickedness.  The joy of knowing that there is a Hope, that though the struggles continue on, day in and day out, the victory is ours to claim!

Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Thanks indeed!  

Lord, for the many times I fail You either by doing or not doing what I should, I ask forgiveness.  Thank You for Your Word convicting me and being in my heart so that I can't just blithely pass off these little white lies and the choices I make to either participate or ignore my friends when they need a little help.  Thank You for deliverance, Father.  Tomorrow, help me to do better I pray, in the name of Jesus.  Amen.