Martha, Martha

{Today's blog is deeply personal and is written as I ponder the extreme pain of a friend who gave in to the lies of the devil. Why? Why, when she was surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses did she fall? The Lord had brought her out of this mess on more than one occasion and yet...yet she fell down again.

Her fall is my opportunity to rise, to do better, to be better. Father, open my eyes, my ears, my heart to those who are hurting around me that seem to have it all together, that look okay on the outside. May I look more deeply, Lord, to see if there is a need I can assist with. In the name of Jesus, I pray this. Amen.}

But the Lord answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things..."

In the past, I have often taken the "ye" out of a Bible verse and replaced it with my own name.  However, the scripture I will be referencing today--Luke 10:41--already has the correct name in it although I am sure by the time I finish this blog, mine will need to go where hers is.  Maybe you too will find yourself there.

Sigh.  The cares of this world.  How they overwhelm us--in spite of our best intentions.  We keep telling ourselves if we stay busy, if we read enough, sing enough, attend church and religious functions enough that somehow we will be okay.  And oh the shows we put on!  The pretty smiles, the joyful praises that come from our lips, the testimonies of what the Lord has done for us.  And they are sincere, oh no sir:  no doubt about the honesty of them.  Our salvation is secure and we rejoice in that but...

But then comes time to go home.  The house is empty.  The walls close in.  The memories come, as do the devil's demons.  Taunting us of "better days."  Reminding us of "all of those good times" while somehow erasing the times that weren't so good.  So, we try to distract ourselves, read a book, play some music, watch some tv.  And then it continues:  those voices, those images, those thoughts.  

We reach for the chips but they don't satisfy.  We reach for our Bibles but for some reason they just don't seem as effective as they did when in the group study.  We pray for deliverance but feel like they are unheard and unanswered.  We tell ourselves we're just being silly, that God does love us, and that He will fix this brokenness inside.  And we wait for Him to do so.  And we wait.  And we keep smiling, keep hoping, and keep coming back to that empty place where those demons are because we find some comfort in their companionship.  At least we aren't alone, right, when they are there to accuse, to cajole us into former habits, and to take our eyes off of God?  Instead of being still and knowing, we doubt.  We fear.  We ache.  

We cave.  Maybe just once we go back to those old ways and addictions we used to forget.  The guilt is overwhelming but...but for a moment, one tiny moment, we forgot.  We didn't hurt.  The allure overtakes us and the next time, and then the next, and the next all blur into one mindless attempt to not feel and yet, yet the pain still comes.  What to do??  "If it feels good, do it" the devil whispers in our ears.  "It's only one time more:  what can it hurt?"

The cycle continues until one day we realize we've fallen into that pit again.  But, it took so long to get there that we truly thought we were okay.  I mean, no one noticed the difference in us when we were using, right?  We must've hid it pretty well, otherwise surely someone would have known, would have called us on it, would have smelled the alcohol on our breath, noticed those extra pounds, would have seen the tracks and/or burns on our arms, would have seen that there was something off in our mannerisms.  Surely to God someone would have seen we were on the precipice, as off-balance as one can get, and surely someone would have reached out a hand to save us.  Right??



Oh my friends, how guilty I feel at this moment.  The ones I sit next to on the pews or shake hands with during fellowship or avoid at the end of the service 'cause they're always wanting to talk my ears off or are whining about something.  The ones I pass in the stores or work with on a daily basis.  The ones I live with and the ones I profess to being friends with.  Am I?  Am I their sister in Christ, their sister in the flesh, their friend?  If so, how can they hurt this deeply and me be so blind to it?

But the Lord answered and said to her, "Stefanie, Stefanie, you are worried and bothered about so many things..."

Yes, Lord, I am.  

Do you remember the rest of this passage, child?  "..but few things are needed--or indeed only one."

But God? Sometimes I do sit at Your feet.  Sometimes I do just sit and ponder on how great You are and all that You have saved me from.  But Lord?  Lord, I still feel so alone, still feel those awful hurts that are still jabbing inside of me.  Sometimes I still feel the fury, the hate, the love, the sadness, the loss...  And I know people get tired of hearing me talk about it.  I see their eyes glaze over when I come near.  I see them dismiss me before I even get a word out.  I know they are just hoping I'll go away and leave them alone.

Oh child, I know.  I know!  Your struggles are real and more than they, I know how your heart aches.  I know your strength is waning and you must, you must rely totally on Me.  Those drugs, that alcohol, food, sex, shopping, gambling, and other things you use to distract can never take the place of Me.  You must surrender all, ALL to Me.  Only then can I heal you.  Only then can release and relief be found.  Only then can you be made whole.  Will You trust Me, child, once and for all?  Will you trust that I will--and want--to fix those broken areas of your life?  Will you turn to Me in complete trust, faith, and take My yoke upon you?  I won't let you down, love.  Let these things go and hold onto Me.  Surrender and be saved from the madness.  

Oh Lord, I want to!  I need help.  I need Your help!  I need...You.

That's why I am here, child.  I love you and you are Mine.  Nothing can pluck you from My hand.  Are you ready to hold on to it, to hold on to Me?

Paid in Full

Last weekend, I had lunch with some family members to celebrate the hub's and his aunt's birthdays.  The date had been set well in advance.  The place was chosen.  The time was set.  Guests were invited and we even had two more unexpectedly but happily show up.  

The meal was prepared and the anticipation was at its peak as it soon was time for the presents to be handed out.  Even ones whose special day it was not supposed to be received gifts.  The cake was candled, the ♫Happy Birthday♪ song sung, said candles were blown out after wishes were made, cake was passed around and devoured, and then came the climax of the event:  the waitress brought the check.

Virginia had already whispered to me that she and my uncle wanted to pay.  I whispered back "Had I known that I would have ordered the steak!"  It was all fun and games until it was time to settle up.  I distracted our aunt and grabbed the check, because I wanted to pay.  After all, it was her special day--and my hubby's--and too often they have bought our dinners and suppers.  

While I've known this woman for over thirty years, that day I saw Virginia do something I had never seen her do before:  she got up and stormed off.  I was mortified!  She has always been peaceful and peace loving, always avoided conflict of any kind, and again, I was dumbfounded.  I quickly interrupted the other end of the table where Steve was, told him what had happened, and he immediately went to see to her.  His cousin just kind of watched it all, seeming nonplussed about it, and I sat there, miserable, and wondering how this was all going to turn out.

Fast forward to yesterday's morning Bible Study.  The topic was sacrifice and the girls and I discussed some of the things Christ gave up so that we could one day be with Him.  God too had a date prepared for a  life-changing event.  He invited many to come.  He presented His Son as the present, and the preparations were all in order.  Imagine His hurt, His dismay, His disappointment when the guests did not arrive.  Feel His betrayal as many tried to pay their own way instead of accepting what was freely being offered. See the dismay in His eyes as the guests grumbled amongst one another over who was really the special one there.  In great anticipation this meal had been prepared.  But...but what if in His righteous anger, His holy disappointment, His refusal to accept others trying to pay for something that only He could, what if He--what if He too walked away?  What if He'd said He'd been planning this all along and this was what gave Him pleasure and that He wanted to do this for His children whom He loved and instead, instead that payment was taken out of His hands, rejected if you will?  What if He thought to Himself  "Enough!  I've planned.  I've sacrificed.  I've been looking forward to this for a long time but obviously these people refuse to accept what I so freely give?  Bah!  Enough!  I quit!"

Scary, huh?

Okay, I think you all get the picture so I'll wrap this up.  Soon Steve and Virginia came back to the table, smiling, her with check in hand because she was successful in making the final payment for the group.  She kissed me and hugged me and again reiterated how she'd really wanted to do this.  Harmony abounded and I've got the photos to show for it. 

As far as Jesus, though, and His invitation to pay your bill?  Now, that's something you and He will have to work out, if you haven't already done so.  He could have walked away from the cross.  All of His "friends" did, deserted Him in His hour of need, and though He could have called 10,000 angels, He stayed.  He paid your bill.  And mine.  His sacrifice for our salvation.  He's planning another event, you know.  The Marriage Supper of the Lamb.  I can't wait to dine with Him, can you?  Wonder if He'll have cake, with candles on it to make a wish?  Ahh, probably not.  The candles, I mean (fingers crossed for the cake!).  Us being there to celebrate with Him is the greatest present.  Unfathomable, huh?

Let's pray!

Dear Lord God, as I contemplate these three events, I am filled with so much emotion.  First, I thank You for once again revealing Yourself to me in the common, everyday activities.  I see You when I look for You and am continually enlightened to the many different ways You reach out to Your children.

Next, God, I thank You for this gift of Jesus.  I cannot help but feel unworthy and it's hard for me to not try to pay You back in some way but we both know I cannot even come close to this priceless present.  So, I will honor You, Father, with my life and do my best through the righteousness of Christ in me to share His story and lead others to You.

Lastly, Lord God, I thank You for not walking away.  You stayed.  You remain constant.  You don't change, nor does Your love for Your people.  Thank You for being this way and loving so intensely.  My hope is that I too can have such passion for those You place in my life, Father, and love them the way You have and do still love me.  In the name of Jesus Christ I pray this:  amen.

It Heals Better If It's Covered Longer

A couple of hours ago I saw a commercial for BAND-AID Brand.  It was sweet, gentle, and comforting.  The key phrases in it were  "Covering is caring.  Covering heals."  

It went on to show a blanket being put around a sleeping kid.  A fly sheet was put on a horse to warm it.  Parents of a tiny baby ran through the rain under the shelter of a coat placed over all of their heads.  A helmet was placed on a young boy's head as he started off on his bicycle ride.  A family was watching a scary show and dad covered daughter's eyes so she wouldn't be frightened.  Oh, and I mustn't forget the dude who covered up his hawg so it wouldn't get bothered by the elements.

The fella in the background talked soothingly about protecting the things we cherish.  As it played, I couldn't help but think of another product (if you will) that covers, protects, heals, and cares.  His name is Jesus Christ and Psalm 91:4 tells that "He will cover you with His feathers; you will take refuge under His wings. His faithfulness will be a protective shield."

Are you in need of comfort today, friends?  Got some boo boos that need some special attention?  Are you concerned for a loved one?  Take your cares to Christ.  If You'll allow Him to, He will heal the scars on your hearts and in your bodies.  He will care for you better than any brother or friend.  Under the wings of God, there is no harm that can overtake you.  The hurt and the Healer collide when we cry out to Jesus.  Aren't you tired of the pain?  Do you want some relief from the storms in your lives?  All you have to do is go to Him.  Remember the story of the prodigal son?  His dad was watching for his son's return.  Yours is too.

Let's pray.

Dear Holy God, how I thank You for the comfort You so willingly give and supply.  As I reflect on this verse and the commercial that reminded me of Your capacities, Lord, to fix what is broken, my heart sings a quiet song of rejoicing.  Thank You for healing me, for kissing me when I hurt, and for allowing me to burrow in Your arms when I just need to be held.  I love You and praise You for all that You do to make me better.  In the name of Jesus, amen.

What right do I have?

Wow.  Ouch.  Uh oh.  Yes!

These are just a few of the expressions I felt after reading this passage of scripture from Psalm 50.  You see, I had been pondering my morning prayers and thinking about how I am so bad to present God with my wish lists all of the time instead of taking the time to thank Him, to praise Him, to see if there's something I can do for Him instead of me just all of the time telling Him what I want, think I need, and how to do His job.  I came into my Pretty Purple Room, looked through a couple of chapters of my Bible, and then thought "Well Stef, if you are sincere about wanting to please Him, perhaps you should head towards the Psalms.  They are more about Him than many of the other books that tell of His wonders and what He does for us.  Maybe if you go there, you will find someone writing a song to God, a praise of His glory, or some other form of worship that will propel you into a truer state this morning."

So, I did.  Read it with me now (in case you can't see the fine print on the photograph)?

16 But to the wicked God says:
“What right have you to declare My statutes,
Or take My covenant in your mouth,
17 Seeing you hate instruction
And cast My words behind you?
18 When you saw a thief, you consented with him,
And have been a partaker with adulterers.
19 You give your mouth to evil,
And your tongue frames deceit.
20 You sit and speak against your brother;
You slander your own mother’s son.
21 These things you have done, and I kept silent;
You thought that I was altogether like you;
But I will rebuke you,
And set them in order before your eyes.
22 “Now consider this, you who forget God,
Lest I tear you in pieces,
And there be none to deliver:
23 Whoever offers praise glorifies Me;
And to him who orders his conduct aright
I will show the salvation of God.”

See what I mean?  Wow.  Ouch.  Uh oh.  Yes!  How many times a day do I forward an email, re-post a pretty picture with some scripture reference on it, sing songs, and maybe even go so far as to write an encouraging word to another, all in the hopes of "declaring God's statutes" while on the other hand I sit back and allow the evils of the world to go on, to participate in looking the other way while the things God said to stand for instead I am rocking in the chair with the ones committing said actions, laughing even with them, as we proclaim how good and kind God is, so full of love, and just wants us all to get along?  Ugh!  Couldn't you just spit such bile from your mouths?  I know I can.

Thankfully, though, there is a "Yes!" in this passage that grants me--again--hope:

"Whoever offers praise glorifies Me;
And to him who orders his conduct aright
I will show the salvation of God."

Praising God: that is what this life is about.  The Lord God and it is Him to Whom I owe all of my praise, worship, and redemption.  Through His Son Jesus Christ, I was shown salvation.  I accepted it, gladly so.  Because of it, because of Him, I don't have to be torn into pieces. I am delivered, and I will not forget that it is God Who gives me this opportunity.  May I glorify You with my labors and praises, Heavenly Father, is my prayer today.  Amen!

Seasons in the Sun

It happened two nights ago and I am still trying to recover from the effects.  It was such an innocent, everyday comment, but one that has left such a foul taste in my mouth that I don't think all the bottles of Listerine could wash it away.

I became "That Woman."  I shudder even now as I recollect it.  For you see, I had always held myself to a higher standard and vowed to not be one of "Those Women."  I can barely get the words out because I am feeling so much loathing and disgust at me.

"Whatever happened, Stef?" you must be wondering.  I'll tell you, but it ain't going to be pretty.

A friend of mine has cancer.  Again.  She beat it the first time (this was before I knew her) and has had quite the testimony since.  How I admired this lady on so many levels and envied the friendships she had--one in particular.  As she and I became friends, we never quite made it to that high level she had with this other woman but I always admired her, always enjoyed her company, and always deep in my heart hoped that one day we would.

That day never came.  Do you believe that there are "seasons in life" that we go through?  I used to think that was such a cliche` but as I age, I find it holds true in so many ways.  Our paths soon stopped crossing and through the past years, we only see each other on occasion and then, it's only in passing.  We'd say the polite things one is supposed to when faced with old acquaintances--and mean them, because there was a genuine love there that didn't just disappear.  However, that pull for more, for another meeting with just the two of us to catch up, to talk about our kids and grandkids, church, husbands, and such just wasn't strong enough.  I'd still feel that twinge, though, after seeing her.  Sigh.

So, back to the present, when I heard of her awful battle being warred again, I hurt.  I felt so sorry for her.  I wanted to reach out, to call, to write, to even drop by for a visit but...but I didn't.  I didn't know if I'd be welcomed because--and here's where it gets tricky, friends--it takes an awfully special person to visit with those who are sick, bereft, and needy.  What if I couldn't be that person?  What if my own limitations held me back from being what she needed?  I put off the phone calls.  Put off the sending of a card.  I still prayed for her and wondered about her and devoured each piece of intel I'd hear about her.  And then, BAM, it happened and I turned into that wretched woman.  

I saw her daughter two nights ago and after the casual hellos were said, I asked about her mom.  Then (gulp!) I said to her "Will you please tell her I said hello and that I am thinking of her?"

The moment--the second!!--the words started spilling from my lips I wanted to retract them.  How dare I place that responsibility on this young lady who probably hears those words so many times she could scream and inwardly is thinking how fake all of these so-called friends are who won't take the time to say those words personally to the soul who needs to hear them the most?!  Why should she have to do this chore?  How dare people like me be so callous and insincere and still have the gall to call ourselves Christians?  I hold myself in contempt and am so furious with me that I cannot bear it.

Naturally, the devil has since mocked me and beaten me down and tried to make me even more miserable.  After letting him win a few rounds, I decided to fight back.  I got my cards out.  I picked out a special one and wrote the words I hope will touch my friend to show her that I truly do care.  I confess my fault to you and to my Lord that I have not been doing the work that He called me to do.  I bow my head in shame as I write these words but am gradually raising it because I am doing the right thing now as I reach out to my sister.  I'll let you know if she accepts my right hand back into fellowship.

Let's pray.

Dear Father, as I ponder these actions from the past few days and throw in the attacks that the devil sent to further cast me down, I thank You for raising me back up.  I was in a sad state yesterday as I thought of this, as well as the other friend I said goodbye to, at a memorial service.  Out of the blue, You sent me two of Your finest soldiers.  The first came to my right and unknowingly lifted me up with her light and cheery disposition.  The second came a few minutes later, with her quiet sensitivity and support that she didn't even know she was giving.  And then, finally, last night at church, You surrounded me with that great cloud of witnesses and filled my heart with so much love and sense of belonging to replace the hole left from not so very long ago.

What a tremendous God You are!  And not to leave any of Your kids out, I was reminded that there were three more who had my back, so to speak, but didn't realize what all the load on it was.  They kept me up with their prayers to You on my behalf and let me stand without buckling, Father.  

Lord?  I know I fail You so very often.  Thank You for giving me more opportunities to do it right.  May I ever learn and strive to be more like Jesus is my prayer today.  I ask it in His name.  Amen.

Come Back To Me

Tell me honestly:  do you ever get in a rut when doing your Bible reading?  I do.  I’ve been reading it for as long as I can remember and sometimes when I see the heading for a particular passage, I inwardly sigh and think “Great.  This one again?”

That happened this morning.  I picked it up and it was open to Luke 22 and the heading was “DEATH AND RESURRECTION OF JESUS, THE SAVIOR.”  I again sighed, wondering how many times I could read this story and why did the topic of death have to be prevalent when I am in mourning over Lisa?  Reluctantly, I picked it up, adjusted it just so, and before the first three verses were read, my mind was stimulated and I was raring to go!

As I continued--stopping three times during the chapter to write down particular verses that grasped me--the hubby called.  He does this to let me know he’s almost made it safely to work.  Before even saying hello, I began effusing that I have a song for him today.  “Remember that song by David Cook that I really like but you don’t really care for it” I asked him?  “Come Back To Me” I continued. He started to explain that he did too like it but I had to interrupt him to tell him that that was a “yes or no” question because it would soon be time for him to clock in and what I had to say was just so important.

I then read him the following passage of scripture from Luke 22:31-32:

And the Lord said, “Simon, Simon! Indeed, Satan has asked for you, that he may sift you as wheat.  But I have prayed for you, that your faith should not fail; and when you have returned to Me, strengthen your brethren.”  (emphasis mine)

I was so excited!  You see, I have a song in my head at most times that will fit almost any occasion and voila`!  Courtesy of songwriting team Espionage this one fit this situation.  

How many of us, like Peter, have denied our Lord?  How many of us have put Him on hold while we try to find ourselves, to try to figure out who we are and who we want to be and if we are ready to leave our old selves behind in our desires to be more like Christ?  And how many times has He, loving Saviour that He is, waited for us, given us time, and opened His sweet arms wide when we come to our senses?  Jesus knew Peter was about to deny Him and yet He gave him this promise with a purpose for Simon Peter to fulfill:  strengthen your brethren.

So often we learn things the hard way, don’t we friends?  While others make the mistakes ahead of us and share them with us, too many times our stubbornness keeps us from choosing the right way, huh?  But those other times:  those times when we do learn?  Ahh, you see, that’s why we share our stories.  That’s why I write my heart out to you.  That’s why I’m so concerned for you.  How I wish you could learn from my mistakes!  How I yearn for you to not follow the wrong path and to hold so much bitterness and regret and unforgiveness in your sweet hearts!  Mostly, I long for you to know Jesus the way I do now in my older years.  The first half (two-thirds?) of my life, I knew all about Him--or so I thought.  Ahh, the changes, the truths, the love He has shown me these past sixteen years or so.  The lessons learned and the ones I didn’t have to face on my own because I finally got over myself enough to see there was a better way than the one that in my foolishness I often chose instead.  

Like in the song, Jesus will “let us go.”  He will set us “free” to be who we need to be.  He doesn’t force Himself upon us.  No, not at all.  But when we find us, when we discover He is Whom we need?  Then, my loves, my fellow wanderers, is when we are free indeed!

Let’s pray!

Oh sweet Lord, what a wonderful Saviour You are!  Not pushy, not harsh.  Gently and watchingly, You await the return of Your children.  Those whom the Father gave to You will not be lost.  

For all the times I strayed, for all the crazy schemes and dreams I tried to make into a reality that took me further from You, I apologize, Lord.  I can’t fix me.  Only You can save me.  Thank You, Lord Jesus, for waiting for me to come back to You.  I’m Yours now and my prayer is that I won’t be so stubborn, hard-headed, nor hard-hearted.  Thanks for loving me when I didn’t know how to love myself.  In Your holy and precious name I pray.  Amen.

You Don't Know

We read this devotion the other morning and, as He's just so fond of doing, the Great God revealed His Word to be true through the actions of our grandsons.  Please don't just look at the picture today and go on, friends.  Read it.  Read the following words.  Watch the video at the end.  Lastly?  Stop your whining and grumbling.  God knows what He's doing!  

"But you don't know what I know or see what I see" is the key sentence in this passage.  Too many of us are in such a hurry, aren't we?  Always wanting to know the end result to see if the amount of labor we are about to put into something is going to be worth the pay off.  And, in our haste, we mess up.  We find obstacles and stumbling stones.  Things that we might avoid if we were paying better attention instead turn into things we run headfirst into--and then we wonder why we are sick, why we itch, why we hurt.

And then?  Then we want to rant and rail against anyone and anything.  We'll angrily slam our fists into a wall (better than a person's face, huh)?  Harsh words may spew from our mouths.  Expenses may incur from the damages created by our impatience and lack of taking our time to do things slowly, carefully, and correctly--the first time.

In conclusion, I want you to now watch this video I made, featuring my hubby who God so often uses to make things sensible to me.  Hope this helps you out as well!

Let's pray!

Dear Lord:  as today begins and we battle our To Do Lists, I ask that we first take a moment, right now, to stop and ask You to guide us.  You know the road ahead of us and we have the lovely verses from Proverbs to aid us:  "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight."

May we walk in You today is my prayer, Father.  Love You!  Amen.

"Pull that Peach!!"

Have you ever heard it said that married folks start looking alike, talking alike, and dressing alike after being together for so long?  I find it's true in my love story with Steve. 

For a while now we have not only been completing each other's sentences, but often before the words are formed on one's tongue, the other is already mouthing the response that was on the verge of being spouted.  We laugh and feel a deep contentment that we know one another so well and there is such a security in our relationship that I feel soon we won't even have to chat to one another; we'll just gaze into each other's eyes and read the thoughts going on in the mind of the one being looked upon.

It's also funny how a family will have the same gestures, the same expressions, and the same wit.  These characteristics are inbred, sure, but they are also copied and mimicked and picked upon by the extending family so that once again, communication is easy and not forced, not fake, and not phony.  The only real drawback to it is when the words that come out or the gestures expressed are those that are negative rather than the good we try to instill in our loved ones.

Disciples of Jesus are known by their fruit.  I've been pondering that these past sixteen or so hours.  I've been wondering how so many can spend so much time with Christ, be brought up in His house, learn His teachings, sing songs about Him, and yet...and yet, there's something missing.  Oh sure:  they can sing the songs, word for word, and not miss a beat.  They can quote the scripture passage in the KJV and/or other translations, as well as cite the chapter and verse.  They can walk the walk, talk the talk but...but somehow it seems...off.  Their fruit is not ripe.  The color is not quite what it should be.  The taste is one of bitterness rather than sweetness.  Rather than the words of Christ flowing smoothly, they are more of the recitation variety, incorporated flagrantly into language instead of being a sweet aroma that rolls naturally off of the tongue and leaves a delightful fragrance behind.

If I as a woman who has been married to the same man for over thirty-two years can know my husband's thoughts before they are often evident to him, can predict his moods by the circumstances around him, and can often voice for him what gets tangled up in his tiny little brain, how much more does Christ do this for me?  And since Christ is so big, so great, so awesome, and since He has been a part of my life for longer than Steve has, shouldn't I be able to reciprocate and know His thoughts?  I Corinthians 2:16 tells me I can.  Acts 11:26 tells me that Jesus' followers were called by His name because they acted so much like He did.  If I am truly His, shouldn't you be able to see that without me having to go around and profess it, wear it on my shirt or jewelry, or by my scripture posts all over places where it's meant to be seen--by others?

In conclusion, I want to ask you today:  is your fruit ready to be eaten by others?  Is it peaked to perfection (makes me think of that Yoplait commercial where that woman yells "Pull that peach!"  at just the right moment).  Examine yourselves.  Is your flavor sweet, sour, or bitter?  That's the taste you are leaving in other's mouths when they consider you, when they consider me.  Do you need some pruning, some fertilizing, and/or some water?  Maybe you need to have more Sonshine on you?  Whatever the condition your tree is in today, I encourage you while you still have time this season to check up.  Don't wither on the vine.  Don't dry up.  Lastly, don't be unfruitful.  

"Therefore as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude."  Colossians 2:6-7.

Let's pray!

Dear Lord, as we come to You today and reflect on our selves, we ask You to point out to us our flaws.  Reveal our weaknesses and build us back up in Your strengths.  Multiply our harvest, Father, so that we may bring honor to You is my prayer, asked in the name of Jesus my Saviour.  Amen.

Open letter to Governor McCrory

Dear Governor McCrory:

I started to write “Hi.  You don’t know me” but I think that perhaps you might, actually.  No, our paths haven’t ever crossed but...But you are my governor and I feel pretty sure there’s a reason you have been put into such a place as this.

I pondered that yesterday, while sitting in church.  I wondered “Did Pat McCrory have any idea what momentous part of history he would be playing when he signed the HB2 law?”  I also pondered the verse from Ephesians 6:12, which states:  

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.   

Did you know, Governor?  Did God give you any fair warning that you were about to embark on changing history, on being ridiculed, mocked, scorned, and put through the fire?  Like Esther, you were put in this time for this story, and maybe you are an unwilling pawn.  But again, I don’t think so.  It takes a lot to show a man’s character and I think you are doing an excellent job.

Now I have a request for you.  Will you continue to stand?  Will you be strong in this battle to which you have been thrust into?  Will you not cave into the pressures of those who are out to continue to destroy this world with their proclivities and madnesses?  For you see, they have been blinded.  Their eyes have been closed to truth and they are just wandering about, seeking any cause to follow that helps them to feel better about their own sins.  I don’t mean that to sound judgmental but here’s the thing:  we are all sinners and in need of a Saviour.  When we can get our eyes off of ourselves, they tend to wander to those who we perceive as being worse than us and therefore, we don’t have to deal with our sins.  Misery loves company, right?

I want you to know that I am so proud of you for not rallying back with hatred, but instead you are showing compassion, offering understanding for what has been twisted, and staying gentle in this fight.  Gentle as a dove and wise as a serpent.  I commend you, Governor, and just wanted you to know that you are not in this fight alone.  While my reputation at my house with my grandsons is that “Granny is a lover, not a fighter” this situation has really gotten out of control.  While I won’t go out onto the battlefield and fight fire with fire, I will support you, my state, my kid and grandkids, and those I love with my prayers, with the small podium I have on my blog site, and with whatever else God lays on my heart to do.

Thank you for your time and again:  keep standing.  We need you.  

Charles Barkley recently made a comment that sounded like something I heard from the movie “A Few Good Men” where he stated it was his responsibility to “stand up for the people who can’t stand up for themselves.”  Just as he is entitled to stand, Governor, we are too.  It’s still America.  We still have our First Amendment rights of free speech and I appreciate you letting me state mine.

Sincerely,

Stefanie Hutcheson

Fun Friday!

James 5:13-16 states:  Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

On that note, I present to you today a fun challenge.  Last night, you see, as Steve and I had inadvertently (again) put off our prayer time, I commented to God how easily it is to put Him on the backburner when our needs are few, when our peace abounds, and when things are going well.  Oh the things one takes for granted!  

So, today, I want you to take the first initials of your first, middle, and last name (if you're a woman and feeling extra perky, you may also use your maiden name's initial and do an extra of your choice), and write a one-word response.  The order is as follows:  first initial, write a praise.  Second initial:  write something you are thankful for.  Lastly, with the third initial, write something you are requesting as a prayer.

 I've done mine on the poster but here it is again for those who are reading on phones:

S (for Stefanie):  SAVIOUR   
D (for Diane):  DRIVING
H (for Hutcheson):  HUMILITY

As you can see, I am so blessed to have Jesus as my Saviour!  I am thankful that I can drive because so many are not able to.  Lastly, I need prayers for humility because earlier this week I was told I was critical.  I certainly don't want to be so I need prayers that I will admit my faults, ask for forgiveness for this trespass, and call on you--my fellow Christian sisters and brothers--and ask you to pray for me.  Hey:  James said it would avail much so I am excited to see the changes that are going to come about when you all start praying fervently for me!  

Let's do a quick prayer now, shall we?  And please, participate in this event.  I'm curious to see your responses!

Dear Lord, thank You so much for being faithful.  Even though I often forget to talk to You, You are constant, still there, unchangeable, and the same as You were yesterday when my needs were greater.

Today I lift up my Wandering Readers and ask You to pour out a special blessing on them as they take a few moments to praise You, to thank You, and to ask for something that is on their hearts.  Help me to be faithful in praying for them, also, Lord, for it takes a village and for now, this is my home.  May I be a good, wise, and effective citizen is my prayer.  In the name of Jesus I ask these things:  amen.

How Can I Help You To Say Goodbye?

Dread.  Fear.  Excitement.  Anxious.  Scared.  Sad.

These are the feelings coursing through me as I contemplate going to see a dear friend tomorrow--a friend who is dying from cancer.  Oh, there's no use pretending she's not near the end and there's no false hope that her days will be prolonged for much longer.  She's nearly had enough and has made her peace.

But me?  Have I had enough of Betty?  Have I the desire for her to stay here so I can selfishly enjoy her company, her words of wisdom, her notes of encouragement, her constant and steady love for me regardless of how often we actually meet face-to-face?  Can there ever be enough time to bask in the warmth she has freely given to me since our first meeting?

There have been two times in my life when I knew I wouldn't see my loved one ever again.  One, there just wasn't time for because, like Betty, the cancer had ravaged her body and she just didn't have the strength to continue.  The other?  There was time and some would say opportunity but it just didn't work out that way and I knew the last moments we shared in each other's presence would be it.  However, the prospect of seeing Betty tomorrow is different in so many ways.  Like all of us, I cannot predict the future nor say when one's last breath will be the final sigh.

Years ago, Patty Loveless sang a haunting melody called "How Can I Help You To Say Goodbye."  It dealt with last times:  a move that took a girl's best friend away from her; the end of her marriage; and lastly, the death of the woman's mother.  It's a real tearjerker and can really tug at those heartstrings as she croons the words that "it's okay to hurt and it's okay to cry."

I don't want to write anymore about this right now.

Have you seen my Super Suit?

I wasn't prepared.  I went in blindly.  I don't know why I wasn't thinking, but this event I went to soon showed me how very important it is to not go into any arena without my battle gear on--even those (especially those?) that are church-based and/or related.

As I sat behind two sisters whom I love very much (and often look at with envy because of their close bond) and made small talk, I pondered privately when was the last funeral I attended--other than Clyde's (which doesn't really count since the weather prevented it from "properly" being held).  The service began.  The sisters sat there with one parent on either side and I recollected how they said they had to "separate" them so they wouldn't fight.  The preacher spoke a few comforting scripture passages, and then BAM!  It all came together.

Though I tried to contain them, hot, angry tears--mingled with too much heartbreak--overwhelmed me.  They coursed down my cheeks and if anyone was watching, I feel sure they would have thought how much I had loved this dearly departed lady we were there to mourn.  Truthfully, I barely knew this woman and was there to support her family and pay my respects that way.  But as her loss brought to the forefront my own, the tears kept furiously making their way out of my eyes and I knew if I didn't get a hold of myself, this unbidden grief would consume me.

I swiped them firmly off of my cheeks.  Sternly I told myself to stop:  to get a hold of these emotions, for they had no place in a place like this.  And, if you know me at all, then of course you'd know that the "Arguing Stef" (kind of like the good twin and the evil twin) tried to convince me that it was indeed the place, for what better time to cry than at a funeral where that type of behaviour is accepted as well as expected.  

I tried to categorize what led me to these heightened emotions, as the singers sang and the preacher took to the lectern again.  Trying to focus on the practical often aids me in controlling the emotions and taking that step back to see what's really going on here versus what my weak flesh and feelings were trying to convince me of helps my discerning heart to address the real issues. Here's what I came up with:

1. The envy of the two sisters
2. The loss of a loved one
3. The concept of funerals
4. The testimony left behind of the saint who had left us

Ahh.  I see your tricks, devil.  You wanted to remind me that--in a nutshell--I was still hurt at my oldest sister, who had left me many times and in many ways to deal with things that I shouldn't have had to do alone.  You were trying to make me dredge up those hateful things and remember the funerals of my dad, sister, mother, grandmother, and aunt that I didn't get to properly be a part of because of said sister's betrayal.  Lastly, devil, you were trying to make my heart relive hate and remember the bad, bringing into question whether any of these folks indeed were saved and/or left a good testimony behind and what--by the way--would mine be?

Do you see it, friends?  The devil will attack you when you are least prepared, and he has a whole big ol' bag of devices and tricks to throw at you in the most innocent of places and circumstances.  Those sisters I admire?  I see them all of the time but he chose this particular instance to prick me with their fondness for one another.  Death is most certainly all around us and for the most part, I can deal with objectively.  Funerals aren't something I in the past fool with much because of privacy issues and respect for the families.  Lastly, the testimonies of the saints?  Well, that's been forefront in my heart due to the project going on at my church currently.  Things one uses for good, the devil likes to twist, taint, and tarnish in his endeavor to kill and steal our joy.  

Remember the movie "The Incredibles" about the former heroes who are called back to active duty?  There's this one part where Lucious asks his wife to tell him where his super suit is.  Sigh.  I could have used one myself last Saturday.  I could have been better off had I put on my whole armor of God, rather than blithely walking out of my door, with my head in the clouds, rather than focused on the stumbling blocks that Satan was putting in my path.  

In conclusion, there is no safe place on this earth where the devil is not privately planning to trip us up.  There is no relationship that he won't use to try to stir up our own losses and failures in his attempts to kill good feelings we may have toward others.  Lastly, there is no testimony he'd rather destroy than mine and yours.  Be watchful, friends.  Be wary.  He is seeking to devour you, one bite at a time.  Be wise.  Be prayerful.  Get that armor on!  

Let's pray!

Dear Lord, as I come to You this morning, I want to be prepared for whatever comes my way.  In my own clothing, Lord, I will fail.  I will fall without those sandals of peace.  That shield of faith is paramount to keeping my heart protected and that helmet of salvation?  Oh Father, You know I need that on to keep my tender head protected by false doctrine and lies.  Salvation comes from You and You alone.  Dress me in Your righteousness this day, I pray, in the name of Jesus, my Defender, Shield, and Saviour.  Amen!